enforcing my boundaries is a pain in the ass

Meg posted this on Facebook a little while ago and even though I don’t know who Amy Wright Glenn is, I really loved this. Then I started to think about what it actually means for me to be able to do this and I got very uncomfortable. Boundaries are hard for me. I have only […]

Dear daughter, know your worth: a letter I wish my mom had written

There are so many conversations I wish I had had with my mom but never got the chance to. I wish she had told me to know my worth and not settle for being undervalued or overlooked. I have struggled with feelings of low self esteem since I was young and unfortunately, as life takes […]

coming out is about the person outing themselves

I want to talk a bit about the comment I made in my post yesterday that I wasn’t able to come out to my mom because she passed away before I did. In fact, I think I knew for a long time that I was gay but I also knew that as a teenager, that […]

I’m a motherless daughter

This is me at 6, I was pretty cute. This little girl has no idea the storm that’s coming. My mom died at 49. I’m now 42. This is a bizarre fact that I’ve only just come to appreciate as something I have to work through. I have had so much health anxiety for years […]

my mom died the day I graduated from high school

This is going to be hard to write, I don’t often tell this story. The week before I graduated from high school in 1995, my mom, who had been dying from liver cancer, was rushed to palliative care in an ambulance. She was so weak when she went into the hospital the paramedics had to […]

Turning into my mother

I have these moments every once in awhile when I’ll catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror or I’ll notice a gesture or turn of phrase that reminds me so much of my mom. The other day I was in an airport coming home from a work trip and after I finished my meal, […]

we still need people to call our own

We used to live in tribes, even in Europe, where my people are from. My family is from England and Wales and even there, several hundreds of years ago, people lived in tribes with their children and other families. Tribes, in North America, are typically thought of as Indigenous, and this is still true today. […]